I’ve heard a lot of “trying to stay positive,” “I prefer to think positive,” etc., so far, and that’s cool. I get it. But, for me, sometimes telling myself to stay positive feels like gaslighting. Read more

I found my old Plan de Paris in the garage this weekend. The size of a pocket bible. Something about the energy of this book has made me keep it all these years. Or maybe it’s just the sheer magnificence of how it’s organized that makes me hold onto it. Or maybe I just don’t want to let go of that part of my youth, the first time I escaped my childhood and ventured beyond California, alone. Read more

Rant. verb 1. speak or shout at length in a wild, impassioned way. “she was still ranting on about the unfairness of it all” synonyms: fulminate, go on, hold forth, vociferate, sound off, spout, pontificate, bluster, declaim. Sometimes I like to speak at length in a wild, impassioned way. Sometimes I like… Read more

Poem originally published under the name Marla Carlton on September 23, 2016 in Rat’s Ass Review Love and Ensuing Madness

I walk into the club.
I see you at the end of the bar.
I move closer.
You smile. Read more

Not a nurse, not a barmaid
not a cavegirl, not a hooker Read more

I am thrilled to announce that two of my poems have been published in Love and Madness, a collection on Rat’s Ass Review, an online poetry journal. Please take a look if you are so inclined. The poems “In the Beginning” and “Prey” both cover the broad topic of Love… Read more

Listen. I feel like I’m quickly going crazy. Not slow crazy       quick crazy.
Fuck!

The urgency to get into the bath is palpable. It’s the rain. The rain makes me this way.
Ring. Ring. My mom. My dad. Ring Ring. My mom. My dad. A friend I just called Read more

My father is an obstinate man. If I tell him it’s raining, he tells me it’s not. One day, I commented how interesting it was for a painter to paint a cow bright red, and he replied matter of factly, “There are red cows, I’ve seen them.” Read more

my dad loves tamales
but only with lard
bacon grease, real butter,
shortening, 5-star
fat only. on weekends Read more

Introverts are not what you think. I am an introvert, but most people would not believe that. I’m social when I go out. I like people BUT… Read more

I had just found his progress report folded up and hidden in his backpack, and I tried to remain calm as I set the paper on top of my computer. He took a moment. His eyes scanned. Neurons scrambling in his head as he saw the “F” in English and the list of missing assignments. Read more

There’s nothing worse than buying expensive pens and having them swiped by your 12-year-old so he can trade them for candy at school. Yes. You heard correctly. My son actually trades my pens for candy. I want him to be an entrepreneur but not at the expense of my pens. Read more

My first scary memory as a child happened when I was three. A sound had woken me up in the middle of the night. I heafd a knock on the door and my mom talking. So, I squeezed my blankie and headed down the dark hallway toward the living room. I remember my mom looked very nervous. Then, there was another knock. Read more

I am 46. Fuck. How did that happen? When did I move to the other side of the mountain? When did I become my mother? When did I become the mom who knows nothing? When did I become the bitchy wife? When did I become 40 and pissed off? Read more

As I was sitting in a therapist’s office for the first time in my life this week, I wasn’t sure what to think. I began to speak, but then she stopped me. “Hold on. Before we talk, I want to inform you regarding the things I’m required to report to authorities.” Read more

I sit at my laptop all day long, from the moment I return home at 9am after dropping my children at school, to the moment I leave to pick them up from school at 3:30pm.

Let me make this clear. I do not get up from my chair all day except for three reasons: 1) I make a Nespresso Latte for myself around 9:30am. 2) I forage through the fridge around 1pm for something to eat for lunch, usually with a spoonful or two from the jar of Dulce De Leche I keep in the fridge! 3) I have to go to the bathroom. Read more

I just woke up from a dream, or perhaps a nightmare, where I learned that the Earth will implode on itself in two years. That’s it, two years from today. That’s all we’ve got. When I woke up, it got me thinking. What if that were true? What if we only had two years before some catastrophic event happened on earth that destroyed it. What would I do, if I knew I only had two years left, if everyone only had two years left? Should I be sitting at a desk? Read more

Water calms me. Baths, steam rooms, pools, creeks, lakes, rivers, oceans,
Niagara Falls.

I soak in the bath for hours. A psychic told me to shower often, to get my head straight, to cleanse, 
wash away other people’s energy. Read more

A 6th grade trip to Italy, God help me. 12 children, 3 parents, 2 teachers. 11 days. EF Tours was the chosen tour company, known for being cheap. They lived up to their reputation. We arrived in Milan on a Monday, after 31 hours of travel beginning at 3:30am at LAX, a long layover in NYC and finally Milan, five movies later. We met up with other assigned groups at the airport. 51 of us piled onto our tour bus that would become our second home for the next 9 days. I’m not a group person. Read more

In the creative world, the word passion comes up frequently in group discussions.

“I’m just not passionate about my work anymore.”

“How do you keep the passion alive in your work?”

“What inspires you?”

All common questions. Read more